Always A Fool

Inspiration and Admiration

2009-02-03T21:57:00.002-05:00

It's been a long time since I consistently tuned into NPR. For that matter, I had also stopped reading the Miami Herald and only yanked coupons when it came in. I even stopped checking into CNN at work and would only glance at the Top Stories box on my iGoogle. At least, until the past week or so.

Now I'm slowly making my way to news junkiedom again and while for the most part it has been a depressing and infuriating return, today I was finally glad I had my radio tuned into NPR and not one of the random pop stations I aimlessly click through whenever my mind is looking for noise. I was on the way home from my adventures in buying a jacket that was more than half an inch thick in February in Miami and The Story was on. I've always liked that show because, well because I like a good story! At first, it wasn't a positive experience this tuning into NPR because I caught the end of a piece on a very successful man who makes video games and who has been doing it for 25 years and who is doing oh so very well despite the fact the economy is going to hell (probably because people in this country stupidly pay $2 for mindless applications for cell phones instead of saving money, myself included) and he sounded so stinking happy and in love with what he is doing with his life that he made me very jealous and thinking very mean, undeserved, painful thoughts that may have included assault by iPhone.

However, it all turned out to be worthwhile when the next piece came on (if you go to the site and listen to the program, this piece starts at 19 minutes) and it was about a man who left a very nutty and wealthy job as a consultant to start a non-profit called the Children's Literacy Foundation. What the foundation aims to do for the children of Vermont and New Hampshire touched my soul. His reasons for starting the foundation made so much sense to me because they were simple-- he loves reading and writing and he values that he can read and write. Me too Mr. McDougall! The city of Miami needs something like this desperately. I have been looking online and have found nothing even remotely similar. Not to mention what I have found is slightly embarrassing in that it is all quite dated and in most cases quite defunct. Also worth mentioning is that the Children's Literacy Foundation receives NO state or federal funds. This makes so much sense right now! So I am left to wonder if there is indeed anything remotely similiar to CLiF here in Miami that I am simply not finding and if not it leads me to a thought-provoking question: Are there no Mr. McDougall's in Miami? If not, can I become a Mr. McDougall?

Define $700,000,000,000

2008-09-22T21:41:00.007-04:00

If you've recently glanced at a newspaper, clicked past a news network, surfed by some headlines, or scrolled past the news radio station you have probably noticed our news organizations are obsessed with the lucky number seven followed by eleven zeroes-- or the more catchy, 700 billion. Specifically, $700 billion is the price tag placed on this highly buzzed government economic bailout plan being rushed through the Congress as I type and you read. For me the number 700 billion means nothing. It's like Monopoly money to me. I don't really know how to look at it as far as the government is concerned. Are we talking the equivalent of a $700 auto bill? Is it more like a $7,000 bathroom remodel? Or is it even like a (sweet) $70,000 salary? Or are we talking a luxury $700,000 home? I couldn't really pin it so I wasn't really sure if I should be uneasy, bothered, shocked, horrified, enraged, etc. So I went looking for a point of reference and thought I'd share what I found in case you're about as confused as I am.

In no way am I setting out to explain the ramifications of this plan. I am not even going to tell you how it makes me feel when I'm done laying this out there. I'm really not going to spin this one way or another and right now I don't even know the exact facts because I'm researching as I type.

Now, about that research. I have been googling and reading and I am dizzy. So, for simplicity's sake I am going to go the easy route. Again, I'm not interested in spin or anything I just need to comprehend $700,000,000,000 because that sounds like a lot of Monopoly money to me but I really just can't wrap my head around HOW much (Baltic? Park Place? Reading Railroad?).

I decided the simplest way to get to understanding this is to use the figures for the 2008 federal government budget which are most easily found on Wikipedia, of course. Here is the link for that. I tried going diretly to the Treasury for this but I was humiliated by their complicated reports and just retreated.

Without further delay, here we go: $700,000,000,000.

The 2008 budget total was $2,900,000,000,000 (or the catchier $2.9 trillion).

If this bailout had to come out of our budget, it would account for (insert simple math that I did all by myself) about 24% of the budget.
At $608 billion, Social Security is the largest chunk of the 2008 budget accounting for 21% of 2008's budget.
At $481 billion, the Department of Defense is the next largest chunk of the 2008 budget. This does not include funding for the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq which are funded through appropriations (although there is a completely separate line item that says Global War on Terror measuring at $145.2 billion).
If you combine Medicare, Medicaid, and the State Children's Health Insurance Program, you get a total of $595 billion (an interesting number given all this talk about healthcare in the country). Throw in Health & Human Services for a grand total of $664.3 billion.
The Department of Education got $56 billion (the only item that did not increase percentage wise from 2007 by the way)
The Department of Veterans Affairs got $39.4 billion
The Department of Transportation got $12.1 billion while the Department of Energy got $24.3 billion (interesting numbers given the gas insanity and all this save the planet talk)
The only department to see a decrease in 2008 was the Department of Labor which cost a, dare I say, paltry $10.6 billion

For my fellow Florida natives, the State of Florida's budget for 2007 - 2008 was $70.1 billion dollars.

I don't know about you, but the number $700,000,000,000 now has some meat to it. I can mold it now and understand it. Can you imagine having to come up with the equivaent of 24% of your annual income? Maybe I'll be able to get my thoughts in order and actually write up a reaction to this information but right now I'm admittedly feeling quite shell-shocked-- like I was just let in on a major family secret.

By the way, I owe a big thank you to my youngest brother (hi David) for helping me find these numbers all while entertaining me with a rant that may or may not have included the declaration that we are now the United States of France? Thank you David.

Don't Go There: Palin as a Mother

2008-09-10T11:19:00.002-04:00

I was listening to NPR last night on the way home. It was late so the show that was on was News & Notes. And when I tuned in, they were discussing Sarah Palin. You should know that at this point every time I see or hear her name I roll my eyes. I think she's a terrible choice for vice president-- walking, breathing, living proof that McCain has lost whatever balls he may have once had. However. Last night they were discussing motherhood and the fact that moterhood has become a Palin issue.

She has five children. One is pregnant and unmarried. Another is an infant with special needs. A few guests on the show tried to say, without exactly saying so, that no way could a woman handle five children and the vice presidency without sacrificing quality for one or the other or possibly both. But none of these women, as they quickly pointed out, dared wanting to judge Palin. You already did! Never in a thousand years would I have thought I'd find myself defending this moron but when it comes to motherhood don't go there. I almost cheered loudly for one guest who just went off about how wrong it is that this was being discussed at all. She pointed out the huge issues mothers face in the workforce like less pay than single women and being hired less than single women. That guest pointed out that most people would be hard-pressed to say how many children Senators McCain, Biden, and Obama had. One guest actually tried to argue that it is because the woman is the crux of the family and that she severely doubted Senator Biden had ever woken in the middle of the night wondering if he had paid the fees for the upcoming field trip...? Wow, thanks for whittling the importance of women in the family down to... field trips. You, dear guest, are a shining example of why we need feminists.

The most miserable part of this discussion was that it was all women. This is just too typical for me to not comment. Women need to back off each other as mothers. I have done it all- stayed at home, worked from home, and worked full time. So when one guest said you could not in any way deny that a woman who chooses to work full time must constantly make decisions to sacrifice one for the other, I was really offended. I'm sorry but work and motherhood are separate issues. That's all there is to it. And everyone has to make sacrifices. I know too many stay at home mothers that sacrifice their relationships with their husbands in the quest to being a better mother and that is just plain wrong. And for the record, I believe it is just as wrong, if not moreso, to sacrifice yourself in the quest of better mothering. Mothers should not sacrifice more or less than anyone else so don't build an argument that way. It is exactly that thinking that keeps mothers out of jobs and with less pay when they do get them.

Palin has enough issues to make me want to vote against her. Don't bring motherhood into the fray. And that goes for her too. I don't use my role as a mother to get myself a good-paying job so quit using your children as a damn badge and run on your credentials, voting records, etc. Opening your accepting speech with the idiotic hockey mom joke was insulting.

Women need to stop tearing each other down when it comes to choices made regarding motherhood. One guest talked about how all working mothers feel that wrenching emotion when they have to drop their child off at daycare because they can't stay home. Speak for your damned self. I love working. I love using my brain in a critical way that I was not able to do when I stayed home. I love interacting with adults. And I love leaving at the end of the day to come home to my family. I feel no guilt about any of this. I am a truly happier person now than I ever was when I stayed at home or even worked from home. Women who work are doing nothing wrong. The women overwhelmed with guilt because they are working need to really and truly understand that. The guilt is there not because you are a better mother than I but because you can't get past the very same notion held by millions of men and too many women in this country-- a woman's job is to care for her family.

Don't go there America. Enough is enough.

South Florida Real Estate Impact: A Personal Story

2008-08-30T16:09:00.002-04:00

In October of 2006, my husband and I had found we were pregnant with our second child. Since we were renting a two bedroom condo in Kendall, we decided it was finally time to buy our first home. We began the search in around November. In December we hooked up with a realtor recommended to us by a friend. In January, we found a really nice town house in Homestead. It was built in 2005 and had not been lived in. The asking was $230K. It was about $10K - $15K more than we had wanted to spend. We talked with our agent about making an offer on the house for $220K and he laughed us off. He told us with the market the way it was, the minimum amount we'd have to offer would be the asking price and that was all there was to it. We listened. We made an offer of $230K after being assured by our lender that our monthly payments would definitely be max $2K a month. Offer was accepted. The mortgage process began and they were able to secure a mortgage for the full amount. It was a fixed rate, 30 year mortgage too. And it was for $2300 a month. We did our numbers again. Things would be tight. Our agent assured us that we'd be able to reduce the payments in less than a year because the house would rise in value and we'd be able to have the PMI removed. Not only that, but we would also be able to sell the house quickly, easily, and at a profit in about two to three years.

Two to three years later, our life is vastly different. It was after one full year of living here that we came to terms with the simple fact that we just could not afford to pay the mortgage unless I went back to work. Even though daycare costs would be incurred, I would be able to make enough to cover those costs and bring in significantly more income. So I went out and found a great job-- in Doral. I had my third baby in June. My oldest son is in Pre-K 4 at a school in Coconut Grove my mother (who lives in Westchester) teaches at. My husband just got a new job-- in Brickell. Life has been beyond insanity and the insanity mostly stems from the distance between our little house and everything else.

Right now, I am waking up at 5:00 every morning and leaving at 6. I am getting home at 8 in the evening. Because of the distance and schedules, my oldest son has to sleep over at my mother's house Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday nights so that he can go to school with her and not suffer from sleep deprivation the way he would if he came home with me every night. My husband has it easier except he just found a new job that begins in the middle of the month. The new job will require a significant increase of time from him requiring more from me regarding the kids. So, it was without a moment's hesitation when we agreed to rent a home next door to my grandmother in Coral Gables for $1500 a month. For our family to survive, there is no other way but to move closer.

This means we have an issue at hand-- the $1500 monthly rent plus the $2700 mortgage/taxes/insurance/association expenses of the townhouse totalling $4200 a month. Before taxes, we bring in $10,500 in monthly income meaning those payments equal 40% of our gross income. So, what do we do? We aren't sure yet. What we do know is that we have to move and we have found a very reasonably priced property that meets the needs of our family of five. We would like to rent our townhouse. Comparable rents in Homestead are about $1000 or $1100. People have actually advised us to walk away from the Homestead property declaring it a poor investment and that it would not be the end of the world. People have advised us to sell at a loss but I can't figure out how to pay for the shortfall (possibly tens of thousands of dollars). People have suggested the short sale route but from what my research shows, we would have a difficult time claiming hardship. People have suggested negotiating with the bank a loan modification but EverHome is unwilling to even discuss the option apparently because we are not in default.

It seems the more research I do, the less it seems people actually know what they're talking about. There are no neutral parties involved as far as the housing crisis is concerned-- everyone has something to lose, or win. Trying to forge a way through (not out) of this nightmare is feeling impossible. So, at this moment in time we have decided on the following Plan of Action:

Move.
With more time on my hands, less stress from ridiculous commutes, lower costs in tolls and gas, and more time with my loved ones I am hoping to achieve clearer thinking.

Allow the house to go into DEFAULT.
We are not ready to go into foreclosure by any stretch of the imagination, but it seems ironically enough that more options will be available to us if we are in Default. Because we cannot afford mortage AND rent payments, this is also inevitable until a tenant is found.

Seek a Tenant.
I do believe the ideal answer, from what I can see right now, is that we hold on to the townhouse for another two years. The only way we can do that is by renting it at a price that allows us to break even on costs. My concerns here are the costs associated with renting our property (it is my understanding our insurance policy has to be completely rewritten) and the trouble with finding a good tenant.

Seek help from HUD.
October 1st is the date the housing bill that was passed in July goes into effect. I have had a hell of a time and minimal success really truly understanding the housing bill and if we would actually benefit from it in any way. HUD counselors should be able to give that information to me as well as any other options or programs that I may have overlooked because I, like 99% of homeowners, don't truly comprehend what exactly is available and to whom.

Form a new Plan of Action.
By the end of the year, we should have a clearer path because of all of these steps.

Needless to say, I have spent hours and hours on the internet. I have not treated this grave issue lightly. Of course, I have made some interesting observations.

There is a very emotional and even moral connection the business of buying and owning a home. Countless commentators on news articles and other blogs repeatedly slammed those who chose the route of foreclosure citing debtors had a moral obligation to pay their loan back. This intrigues me. Clearly, the stigma of foreclosure has not vanished as many claim. But more interestingly for me is how much focus is on moral obligation. I just can't think of many intelligent business people losing money because of moral obligations.

This emotional and moral connection is a very big problem. It is severely clouding judgement-- in those suffering and those watching. I imagine things would be different if ALL homeowners really understood that real estate is a business. Buying a home is nothing more than an investment. My husband and I are not to blame for the current disaster the housing market is. We did many of the right things and have worked hard to keep our investment. The bank took a chance WITH us not ON us. There has to be a distinction there as well. The bank waged the same bet we did-- that our home value would surely rise and would do so quickly.

I know what I would like to see come from this. I know that what I consider the best solution is that we are able to secure a reliable tenant to rent to so that we break even in our costs. Ideally, the market stabilizes soon and we are able to sell the house without too much pain. If renting proces successful, we may choose to stay on as landlords long enough to sell the house for profit and use the profit for a down payment on a more ideal investment (maybe it will be real estate again, maybe not).

The one thing I am certain about is how uncertain the current state of things are. I am not even sure on who I should speak with to completely gain perspective on our options and consequences. We have spoken with a tax specialist and a CPA to understand the ramifications of short sales and foreclosures on that end. We do plan on speaking with a HUD consultant to gain perspective on goverment options. After that?

Like so many out there what I need desperately is closure. I need to grasp a crystal clear picture of what things are really like and where we really stand. But until then, I am going to be excited about moving closer to my family, our jobs, and the school and all of the positives that come with that.

Life in Dade

2008-08-14T10:56:00.002-04:00

For the past couple of months, I have been able to really look at my hometown of Miami Dade County through a microscope. It is one of the benefits of maternity leave that you have a few moments every now and then to just sit and take things in. On August 26, Miami Dade is having its elections and although it is called a primary, many important positions are to be voted on like our Mayor, members of the County Commission, and members of the School Board.

To me, these elections are incredibly important. I see them the way I saw the national elections of 2004-- an opportunity to create some change, send some shockwaves. And in a way, there is evidence that I am not alone. The Miami Herald has endorsed practically every single challenger to the County Commissioners (Hallelujah!). Any time an article regarding anything up for election on the website, the comments are full of passionate responses. Local bloggers are incredibly focused on the elections as well, making recommendations and stirring debate with their readers. But, I cannot escape this nasty sinking feeling in the pits of my stomach-- nothing will change.

Let us pick this apart piece by piece. First of all, there is is the issue of our County Commissioners. Straight from our Miami-Dade website, here is an explanation of just what this is:

"The Miami-Dade Board of County Commissioners is the governing body of unincorporated Miami-Dade County and has broad, regional powers to establish policies for services that transcend city boundaries. The government provides major metropolitan services countywide and city-type services for residents of unincorporated areas.

Through ordinances and resolutions, the 13-member Commission sets policies and establishes laws for the community. Commissioners are chosen in non-partisan, single-district elections, and have no term limits. Miami-Dade County is structured into 13 districts. Residents choose only from among candidates running in the district in which they live. Commissioners serve four-year staggered terms, with elections scheduled every two years. Commissioners in the odd-numbered districts will be elected in November 2008."

As you can see, these are 13 incredibly powerful people. More powerful than our own Mayor. But there are many problems with this system. First of all, there are no term limits. How this came about is beyond my comprehension. We manage to place term limits on the Mayor who has "the power to veto Commission action items. In January 2007, the Mayor was given additional powers providing for the oversight of the day-to-day operations of Miami-Dade." But the Commissioners are there for life. This, for me, creates a horrific situation. I am not sure how this even exists in a city like Miami that is rife with Cuban immigrants who shudder at anything even slightly resembling dictatorship. This is the most legal form of dictatorship in our country and it is thriving.

A look at the campaign contributions to these commissioners would make anyone's stomach churn. But, for whatever reason no incumbent has been defeated at the polls since 1994. They just have too much money to erase any chance of a good challenge. Vendors need to keep their Commissioners happy to guarantee their businesses thrive.

The fact that our County is run by these immovable and unreformable thirteen is one of the problems facing Dade County, although easiest the largest. Right now, there is another crisis and that is within the Dade County Public School System. The problem is we have a Superintendent who cannot get along with 4 out of the 9 School Board Members. And we don't mean a simple disagreement, we mean all out war with the 4 Board Members pushing for the Superintendent's contract to be cancelled. The hostility is outrageous and embarassing. Nothing can get done with the chaos they are in. I understand not liking someone and being disappointed with their performance, but to instigate this type of war against the Superintendent is frankly wrong. There is a process of dealing with shortcomings. Go through the process. He, and the citizens of Dade County, deserves a chance to answer for the many problems these Board Members are citing. Any employee would want such an opportunity. More importantly, they are dealing with a budgetary disaster and they can't get over each other's egos to work things out so that when school doors open Monday, August 18th teachers walk in with their contractual raises ready to deal with the burdens budgetary shortcomings demand. To me, the fact that this has been presented as a Superintendent issue is unfair and wrong. I think Superintendent Crew has an enormous ego and has shown himself to be uncompromising. He has made it far too easy for these Board Members to take such violent opposition to him AND to draw such overwhelming support. I should think the close vote would have been a Reality Check but honestly those Board Members need to look in the mirror. They are NOT fighting for their teachers OR their students if they are so focused on Superintendent Crew. He is not the problem right now. Money is. Deal with the damned budget. Fix the salaries. Do the layoffs that are necessary and yes layoffs are necessary. Any corporation does it when times are tough. Get creative with solutions but fix the real problem-- budget shortcomings. Address Crew when that is resolved.

Dade County has issues-- major and daunting issues. I am just shy of 28 years old. I don't know the answers. I don't know where the issues start or where they begin. Dade County reminds me of two things: my garage and a tangled skein of yarn. My garage has been a nightmare since we moved in two years ago. The terrible secret in our house, I never let anyone in it. This summer I have attacked it on and off and I am happy to say that an end is near. Half of it is done. The other half is 80% done. So you see, it is possible to fix something that seems overwhelming and daunting. The same goes with the yarn. It has happened so many times that a skein of yarn of mine tangles and mangles itself into a maze of knots. I may find one end of the yarn, but the other is lost. I have actually untangled one of these disasters before. It took hours and hours spread across days and weeks. It took a stream of foul language. It incorporated several frustrating false starts and leads. But it came undone.

So, I have to remind myself and others like me that reform is possible. This home of mine does not have to remain as troubled as it is. Step by step by step and dead end after dead end, but there is indeed a viable path. Somewhere. I have vowed to take the LSAT in December just to see if I can do it. If I do go to law school and pursue a career in that field one day, I think civic law is the way for me to go. I have never been ok with witnessing wrongdoing. I cannot continue to be ok with things going wrong in my backyard. For now, I do what I know I can do well-- read and write and read and write some more.

Reaction- School drama: Board meeting spats lure viewers

2008-08-04T01:30:00.002-04:00

I did not get a chance to read a lot of Sunday's Miami Herald but I did manage to read a short piece that I have been mulling over all day long. Here is the text:

School drama: Board meeting spats lure viewers
The Miami-Dade School Board's monthly meetings are drawing a growing audience of fans who are watching the spectacle at home on TV.

BY KATHLEEN McGRORY
kmcgrory@MiamiHerald.com

Forget CSI: Miami or Burn Notice.
The hottest television show set in Miami may just be the monthly Miami-Dade County School Board meetings.
Drama. Rivalries. Insults.
It's reality television, brought to you by the taxpayers of Miami-Dade County. And the viewing public can't seem to get enough.
Consider: The number of people tuning in to the School Board meetings has doubled since February, skyrocketing to as many as 28,500 at any given hour, district officials say.
''The meetings are like a train wreck,'' said Mario Artecona, executive director of the Miami Business Forum and a regular viewer. ``You know it's going to be a mess, but you can't look away.''
Teacher Seth Patterson said he and his wife, Katie, have been watching, too.
''It's been a circus,'' he said.
The School Board has, in fact, been broadcasting its regular meetings on WLRN-PBS 17 since the early 1970s.
Over the years, the meetings have spurred a cult-like following of teachers, parents and others among cable viewers who refuse to reach for the remote.
The audience has been growing.
As many as 19,000 households tune in to the meetings during any given hour of the broadcast, district spokesman John Schuster said.
That number isn't quite as high as the number of children who watch Curious George every morning, Schuster said, but it still represents a spike.
Why so many viewers?
For one, the drama is intense and the stakes are high.

CALL FOR OUSTER

At least three board members are calling for Superintendent Rudy Crew's ouster.
Teachers are battling the district for their raises.
And district officials have cut thousands of jobs in the wake of a budget crisis.
What's more, the board is rife with rivalries.
Board Chairman Agustín Barrera and board member Ana Rivas Logan have sparred over Roberts Rules of Order.
And, of course, there is the constant exchange of insults.
Board members Renier Diaz de la Portilla and Solomon Stinson have had an especially strained relationship.
They recently had a spat over Diaz de la Portilla's proposal to change the district's nepotism rules.

A WALKOUT

In another meeting, this one not televised, Stinson adjourned it and walked out, leaving Diaz de la Portilla reading a memo about firing Crew.
And at each of the last few meetings, more than 100 people have addressed the board.
Children have played instruments and danced. One schools police officer sang. Some of the public speakers have been escorted away from the podium by security guards.
Charlotte Greenbarg, a local activist, said she first got hooked on the School Board meetings more than two decades ago.
She hasn't kicked the habit.
''You can't turn away from it,'' said Greenbarg, who watches the meetings on a 50-inch television screen.
``It's such high drama. And it's live.''

TUNED-IN TEACHERS

Not surprisingly, teachers are among the most loyal viewers.
Paul Lobeck, a teacher at Miami Southridge Senior High, said he made it a point to watch last week's budget hearing on TV.
But a few minutes later, a thunderstorm rolled in, knocking out Lobeck's satellite.
''I was furious,'' he recalled.
``I started calling everyone, trying to find out what was going on.''
Lobeck isn't alone. Several of his students have even gotten hooked on the meetings, he said.
''It makes for good television,'' Lobeck said. ``It's almost surreal.''

COMEDY OR TRAGEDY?

Others say the public spectacle does little to promote confidence in the School Board.
Former Surfside Mayor Paul Novack said he's been staying up late to see how the meetings end.
''Some people find it entertaining because it's comical,'' Novack said.
``But others find it tragic. What kind of example are we setting for our children?''
Justin Koren, a teacher at Southwood Middle, likened the meetings to ``a soap opera on steroids.''
''It can be addicting to watch scandal after scandal for 12 continuous hours without commercials,'' Koren said.
``That is, until you realize the entertainment is at the expense of our children.''

My Reaction

When I'm stuck in the disgusting commute that is from my home in Homestead to my office in Doral and back, I listen to NPR. Once a month I get treated to the School Board meetings. By the time I get to my home, I am 1) embarrassed to call Dade County home 2) Grateful my mom will be able to get all 3 of my kids into the private school she teaches at AND has offered to help me pay their tuition 3) shocked elected officials behave this way in public 4) pretty sure I was only one of a handful listening and 5) livid.

I went on maternity leave at the end of May and so it seems I have missed the disastrous budgetary meetings. I completely forgot they were also broadcast on WLRN. So reading that as many as 28,500 people are tuning into these meetings has me near hysterics. 28,500 people watch these pathetic meetings and do nothing? School board members act like complete jack asses in front of 28,500 people and there are no consequences for them? 28,500 people are ok with teachers getting crap for pay? 28,500 people are ok with the Superintendent being pinned as the scapegoat?

How on earth is this possible? Is this just another case of "Surely, someone else will do something."? How beat up are we as a people today? This is such a depressing reflection on modern society. This the disgusting cycle that seems to have formed locally and even nationally because if you can't fix the issues in your backyard how can you fix the issues at large?

We are so beleagured by our hellish commutes burning up insanely-priced fuel that to even imagine getting into our car for anything other than riding to and from school/work is almost a pipe dream.

We are so mired in financial issues that donating to a cause we believe in is debatable.

We are so scared and untrusting of our neighbors, we no longer communicate with them much more than a nod of the head or a quick wave as you walk from the door to the car and back again.

We are so overwhelmed by the issues plaguing us that we just can't fathom where to begin much less conceive the ending.

28, 500 people are watching a tiny group of people argue, bicker, insult, promote, belittle, and do everything except fix the problems. I've listened to them dwell endlessly on any statistic that may show some improvement no matter how insignificant. And yet, throw stats at them that show how miserably they are failing our children and our teachers and you'll either be ignored or argued blue in the face.

28,500 people.

What would happen if even 1% of that showed up at one of these meetings? 5%? 10%?

Tomorrow the Board votes on whether or not they fire Superintendent Crew. I really hope they remember that when they get to the issue. 28,500 people are watching. Behave yourselves.

I've given up on Dade County Public Schools as an option for my own children but maybe there's hope for my grandchildren.

28,500 hopes?

CNN Presents Black in America

2008-07-24T14:17:00.002-04:00

Last night while pacing around my living room shushing the newborn, I watched CNN Presents Black in America. The special continues today and I think I'm going to have to pass because of how incredibly frustrated I get watching.

These days, it's hard to watch anything on news networks or to read anything in news publications without me getting frustrated. Black in America is an excellent example of why this is. While I find it infinitely interesting that CNN is profiling the experience of a minority in this country, I have to take issue with how black and white they make the issue. Given that for the first time in American history, a member of a minority race is running for President it is dismaying to me that the media is not investigating the story of what it means to be a minority in America. When the conversations come up about racism, they are almost always specifically speaking of prejudice against Blacks. Soledad O'Brien continually brings up voluminous statistics, reports, and analysis-- all focused on Black versus White experiences. In case CNN has not noticed,the United States of America's population has moved on well beyond black or white citizens. How does the black experience relate to the Hispanic experience? Asian? Arab?

More importantly to me, however, is forget the racial experiences-- how do the class experiences compare? The media is not paying attention to what is currently happening in the United States. Or maybe they are, but we are so rooted in racial divide, it's hard to see things as they really are. Something in my gut says that if statistics were analyzed across class lines first and then racial lines, the divide would be significantly smaller. For whatever reason, this nation has become accustomed to separating across racial lines instead of class lines. Maybe it is because today it is much easier to blur the class lines, pretending to be one level when you're really another; however, race is etched onto your very face, hands, body. It seems to me that our society naturally divides by class first, then race but we are not seeing that.

Think of the neighborhood you live in. I have a feeling that while in many neighborhoods, you find a dominant ethnic element, you will also find a dominant class element. Let's face it, the lower class does not usually mix with the upper class no matter how similar the skin color.

During what is possibly one of the greatest economic experience in our lifetimes, it is crucial we turn an eye to society through economic factors instead of racial ones. Every now and then you hear blips about how our middle-class is vanishing. Where is the Middle Class in America story? In a Capitalist society, shouldn't your financial state be more of a dividing line than skin color if there are going to be any lines at all?

I guess what it comes down to really is the great dollar after all. Somehow, Black in America sounds infinitely more provocative than Middle Class in America, doesn't it? Our media knows too well what gets panties into bunches and the bunched up panties rake in several more dollars than your normal solid panties do.

I think Americans have convinced themselves that Classism does not exist here when in reality it is probably the most prevalent ism in our society and could arguably even be the single most driving factor behind racism. For so long, minorities had been forced to stay in the Lower Class that to look not White has become visual cue for Lower Class. Classism has historically relied on Visual Cues. The Nobility were overweight because they could afford food. Clothes were insanely different between classes. Hair. Even COLORS.

I hope the story of Class Experience is told soon. So many disastrous decisions have been recently made with far-reaching implications that simply do not break down smoothly along racial lines alone. This is a complicated country, a complex economy, and a melting pot society. The media needs to approach stories differently if they wish to bring about change.

Reclaiming the Ship

2008-07-17T23:05:00.002-04:00

I think it was when my mother exclaimed, "Madeline, you're 28! 28! My God!" that I began to have a little hope. Despite the fact my 28th birthday is a full month away, I understood what she was trying to convey. She felt the need to clarify anyways, "That's nothing!" By the time she had finished regaling me with tales of her friend, the 90 year old priest who shocked the customs agents upon his return from Bimini on a boat (they never had anyone that age arrive via boat) and her almost 90 year old friend/principal/nun driving off to Georgia to see the new Aquarium, I was thoroughly embarrassed that I had indeed doubted myself at all.

I realized just how comfortable I have become with the habit of closing my own doors, inventing my own ceilings (glass or otherwise), drawing my own lines to color safely within. It is time not only to take a crowbar to some of those shut doors but also forbid myself from shutting current and future doors. This blog is a by-product of this resolution of mine as one of the doors I closed, quietly and nonchalantly, was the one that led to my being a writer-- a great writer.

I am out of practice and slightly disoriented. I am also overwhelmed by the amount of ideas that fly through my head begging me to grab a hold of, dissect, and analyze them. I cannot promise you will find any masterpieces here. I cannot even promise that you will be entertained, amused, or moved by anything written here. This is where I come to practice. This is where I come to prepare for the destiny I thought I had lost and for the ship I thought I had missed.